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Why are relationships so difficult?

It is our experience at The Eaves that the number of individuals and couples seeking help with their relationships increases markedly following the Christmas break.

Relationships can be difficult at the best of times but spend a moment to think of the different types of relationships that you are currently in; are you a parent? A sibling? A boss? A child of older parents? A friend? A carer? A partner?

So many different relationships often require you to be a different version of yourself to them in order for it to be a success. Are you the ‘helpful’ one, the ‘strong’ one or perhaps the ‘funny ‘ one?

These pressures can take away our autonomy, our real sense of ‘self’ and a prolonged period of time in these forced ‘roles’ can lead to increased stress and can sometimes result in arguments, disagreements and upset.

Contact with parents and siblings can cause us to ‘act up’ like children and leave us feeling confused and embarrassed about our behaviour. Work colleagues can affect your whole life as difficulties at work seep into your mood at home leaving you snappy and anxious about returning to work. Feeling unsupported by a partner can leave a simmering resentment that threatens to bubble over and small things can seem to get blown out of all proportion. During the holidays, being at home for weeks with seemingly ungrateful or stroppy children can affect the whole household dynamic, making it an unpleasant place to be.

So what can we do to overcome difficulties? At The Eaves we work with clients one on one, with you as a couple or as a family to figure out what’s going wrong and how to go about changing it. The first key point is to acknowledge that you can’t change someone else’s behaviour. It’s not possible.

You can however change yourself and how you react to that person and the hope is that they may start to respond differently in response to your shift. And even if they don’t, chances are that you will feel a whole lot better about how you have conducted yourself.

We have many different counsellors, psychologists and psychotherapists based in our Guildford, Godalming and Farnham practices who can help you to make these significant changes that will enrich the relationships in your life and as we are open 9am-9pm, 6 days a week, we are guaranteed to find the right therapist to see you at a time to suit.

We recognise entering therapy is a significant investment in yourself and your future which is why we spend time talking to you about what you want from therapy to pair you with the right therapist. Many private healthcare providers are using practitioners associated to The Eaves, please ask if you’d like to use your healthcare benefits.

We also have a low cost counselling service if funding private counselling is a challenge. Just ask.

Call today to discuss what you want to change about the relationships in your life: Guildford on 01483 917000; Godalming on 01483 418245 or Farnham on 01252 820225.

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